Making arrangements for Christmas contact

Christmas can be a special time for families, but for separated parents it can also bring difficult questions about when children will spend time with each parent. Agreeing arrangements early can reduce uncertainty, prevent last-minute disputes and help everyone focus on enjoying the festive period.

Plan ahead

Start discussing Christmas arrangements well in advance. Diaries can fill up quickly with family events, travel plans and other commitments, so early communication gives parents the best opportunity to reach an agreement that works for their children.

Keep the children’s best interests at the centre of the conversation. Their ages, wishes, established traditions and existing plans may all be relevant when deciding what will work best.

Finding the right way to share Christmas

There is no single arrangement that suits every family. Depending on the circumstances, parents may agree to:

• alternate Christmas Day each year;
• share Christmas Day between both parents;
• have the children spend Christmas Eve with one parent and Christmas Day with the other;
• split the key days, for example Christmas Eve and Christmas morning with one parent, followed by Christmas evening and Boxing Day with the other;
• alternate Boxing Day and other significant days during the Christmas holidays; or
• divide the school Christmas holiday between both parents.

For some children, maintaining familiar traditions can be especially important. A workable plan should provide reassurance and avoid unnecessary travel or disruption.

Put the children’s needs first

Christmas arrangements should focus on what works best for the children, rather than what feels fairest to either parent. The festive period can be emotional for children following a separation, so it is important that they are not placed in the middle of disagreements.

Avoid asking children to choose between their parents or involving them in adult discussions about contact arrangements. Where appropriate, their views can be considered in a sensitive, age-appropriate way without making them feel responsible for the decision.

Keep communication clear

Where possible, communicate calmly, clearly and with a focus on practical details. Confirming arrangements in writing can help avoid misunderstandings. This should include collection and return times, travel arrangements and any agreed plans for Christmas Day and the wider school holiday.

Flexibility can also make a real difference. Unexpected circumstances sometimes arise, and a cooperative approach can prevent minor changes from becoming unnecessary conflict.

What if you cannot agree?

If you are unable to agree Christmas contact arrangements, mediation or another form of family dispute resolution may help. These processes give parents an opportunity to discuss arrangements with the support of an independent professional.

If agreement still cannot be reached, particularly where time is short, seek legal advice as soon as possible. In some circumstances, an application to the Family Court may be necessary. The court’s paramount consideration is the child’s welfare, which is why it is best to address disagreements well before the festive period begins.

A clear plan can make Christmas less stressful

Making arrangements early gives children greater certainty and reassurance about where they will spend Christmas. A clear, practical plan can help separated parents avoid unnecessary disagreements and keep the focus where it belongs: on the children enjoying the festive season.

Need advice?

If you need advice about arrangements for your children over Christmas, or you are finding it difficult to reach an agreement, speak to one of our family lawyers at an early stage. We can help you understand your options and identify the most appropriate next steps for your family.

Contact our Family Team on: 01626 772 441 or law@scottrichards.co.uk